So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize