I'm laying in your front yard are you home
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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