Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
