Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize