How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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