Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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