the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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