p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize