I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
