You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
