CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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