you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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