ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Randomize
