Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
