well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
