gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
