I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
