it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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