dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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