You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
