my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
