I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
The air taste purple.
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