so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
