is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Randomize
