Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
