Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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