Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize