I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
