At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
