Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
