THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
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