Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
