WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
