there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
so let's talk penis.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize
