...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize