i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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