took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Randomize
