yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
