I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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