There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
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