Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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