I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
