Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
