I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
