hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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