I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
