If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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