So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize