mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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