Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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