im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
