drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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