just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
