nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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